SINGAPORE: A domestic helper has turned to social media to air her frustration, questioning why some employers insist on summoning their helpers to fetch them a glass of water even when the dispenser is just a few steps away and they are clearly not occupied.
“I don’t understand why you always think that taking water for yourselves to drink is easy, and yet you can’t grab it yourselves,” she wrote.
“If your helper is washing plates and the dispenser is just a few steps away from you, why still call her to bring you water to drink while you are only scrolling on your phone?”
The helper went on to say she has even heard of more extreme situations, where employers deliberately wait for their helper to come out of the toilet before immediately asking her to get them water, all while they remain seated and continue their meal.
She also stressed that domestic workers are hired to assist with household responsibilities, not to be treated like “slaves” or expected to respond instantly to every minor whim.
“You have hands and feet,” she said. “If you don’t micromanage your helper and she knows very well how to handle your household, please have the initiative to get your own water to drink too.”
She also reminded employers that what may seem like a small, harmless request can feel far more stressful in reality.
For instance, during hectic mornings when helpers are rushing to pack bags, prepare meals and get children ready for school, being asked to stop everything just to fill a water bottle for an employer’s leisurely walk can be overwhelming.
“Come on, have some empathy. It’s not because you pay them. It’s about being HUMAN, for goodness’ sake.”
“That is a part of our job. Our job is to take care of them.”
The post received more than 230 comments, with many domestic helpers sharing their own experiences and frustrations.
One individual shared, “Mine is worse than that. I will give you one example. They cannot wait for you while you’re still inside the toilet, pooping or changing your napkins, and they just open the door because they want to ask you for a glass of water.”
“And because I’m a helper and don’t have any right to be mad nor to complain, what I do next is I always make sure I lock the door every time I go inside the toilet, and I even threw the toilet keys to make sure these stupid things won’t happen ever again!”
Another wrote, “For me, I cannot eat if they are still eating. I must serve them hot. They will always call, make this hot, bring the things here. If they still want chapati, I must make for them one by one, so how can I eat at the same time with them? I don’t even have a portable table. Actually, they don’t care.”
A third said, “Had that experience here with my fourth employer, the big boss. So bossy. Yes, even when I’m showering, he will call you to make his coffee, then walk away, which is so easy to do. He will press the coffee machine, then wait for a few minutes for it to brew.”
Some, however, expressed that they do not mind doing this for their own employers since it’s an easy task.
One said, “I don’t care, and I don’t mind taking water for them. Whatever they ask me to do, I will do. That doesn’t mean I don’t have a brain or that I’m a pushover, but I love myself. I love the peace in me.”
Another told her, “Anyway, that is a part of our job. Our job is to take care of them, take care of the household. If you don’t know how to talk to them about that, there is no point in posting here.”
In other news, a local man has taken to Reddit’s Ask Singapore forum to ask whether he was wrong to reduce the allowance he gives his parents after moving out of the family home.
For context, he explained that while living under their roof, he had been responsible for nearly all household expenses. “I paid rent, food, and other expenses, and I wasn’t being calculative—but I gave every cent I could afford,” he said.
