SINGAPORE: Commenters on a Reddit post showed up to support some women who appealed to men to do better after they experienced the behaviour of some men during their first international girls’ trip.
“What really got to us was that it wasn’t strangers or locals making us feel unsafe — it was fellow Indians. In a country known for order and respect, they felt entitled to intrude, follow, and force interactions,” the post reads.
The post on r/TwoXIndia from earlier this week from u/No_Honeydew_5860 began with: ”We’re four college friends who had always dreamed of taking an international trip together once we started earning.”
The women chose Singapore due to its reputation for being one of the safest places to travel to around the globe, particularly for female travellers.
“We felt it would be perfect for our first trip abroad,” they added, and while the first two days of their trip went well, their troubles began on the third day when they visited a Buddhist temple.
An Indian man in his mid-twenties began following them around on each floor of the temple. He approached one of the women, telling her that he visits Singapore often but felt lonely. He added that he “would love to hang out” with them and offered to be their guide, which the women politely declined.
The man then suggested a vegan restaurant on the fourth and fifth storeys of the temple, telling them it’s where the monks have their meals. Because it sounded interesting to the women, they decided to go to the restaurant.
However, the man followed them through every storey, and when they tried to lose him by skipping levels by using the lift, he kept showing up.
When they were paying for lunch, all of a sudden, the man showed up again and offered to pay for one tray, which they declined. However, he said he needed change and insisted that the women give him their cash.
”It was awkward and pushy. We wrapped up lunch quickly and left, but saw him again in a nearby store, still following us after more than an hour. At that point, we were alarmed and took the MRT out of Chinatown,” the women wrote.
Another incident happened the following night, when they were at Zouk. Two Indian men stood next to them, said hello, and ordered the same drinks as they did. While the women ignored them, the men joined in their toast without being asked, after which they told the men to leave.
When they went to dance, the men approached them again. It was only when they moved near the DJ and another group of women joined them that the men actually left.
At the end of the post, the women wrote, “To the men reading this: This isn’t charming, it’s creepy. Learn to read the room. Respect boundaries. No means no — even if it’s not shouted.”
Many commenters on the post were sympathetic to the women.
“You really should have complained to the club authorities or the MRT security at Chinatown. A taste of Singapore’s law enforcement would have taken care of these obnoxious men,” one wrote.
“Indian men should be held accountable for their actions. We’ve been ignoring and pushing them away for a really long time, which only fuels them… Next time, don’t hesitate to involve the police,” another agreed.
“Do men really think it is attractive to repeatedly ask or stalk women? Why is one ‘No’ not enough? Read the room! If the woman is interested, she will let you know,” chimed in a third.
Interestingly, commenters on the post said they had the same experience with Indian men in the United States, France, Thailand, and Germany.
“I went to Singapore on my first international girls’ trip nine years ago, and the same thing happened to us. A group of Indian boys followed us from Little India to Chinatown to Safari… sorry to hear the same happening nine years later,” a Reddit user wrote. /TISG
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