SINGAPORE: A photo of a peanut butter jar and a handwritten note on it has ignited a debate among domestic helpers and employers, exposing how something as ordinary as a spread can trigger bigger questions about limitations, trust, and treatment at home.
The image, shared by a domestic helper named JeJe in the Direct Hire Transfer Singapore Maid/Domestic Helper Facebook group, shows a jar labelled with the message: “No open, JeJe, do not eat, only family eat expensive.” The note, stuck directly onto the jar, made clear to her that the peanut butter was off-limits.
JeJe responded to the note with dry humour, captioning the image: “Don’t worry, madam, I’m allergic to peanuts…”
“I’m also allergic to that kind of employer…”
The post drew annoyance from group members, many of whom found the note excessive or ironic. One commenter asked, “Peanut butter expensive???” Another joked, “I’m also allergic to that kind of employer.”
Others responded with sarcasm aimed at the perceived stinginess of the note. “How much is the peanut butter jar, madam? I can buy 10x for me and share it with your family!” one wrote. Another suggested turning the situation around by buying personal jars of her own and labelling them “Do not eat, only for JeJe.”
Some commenters speculated that the note itself looked unserious, with one saying it “looks like written by a kid.” That commenter added that if an employer truly had an issue, they would likely speak directly rather than leave a written warning on a jar.
“I had a helper who would finish 1 jar of peanut butter in 3 days…”
Not everyone sided with the helper, though. Several commenters defended the employer’s right to set limits, arguing that food costs add up and that some helpers overstep.
One employer wrote, “Just because employers buy all the things at home, some helpers are very selfish and take advantage of everything in the house. They eat so much and finish very fast, and leave a bit for the house. That’s why we need to do this.”
Another added, “Yah lah, maybe you’re taking advantage of their kindness? Finishing up all their groceries. You think your employer prints money or what?” while one comment described a past experience: “I had a helper who would finish 1 jar of peanut butter in 3 days. YES! So before you judge, we employers also have a budget.”
Others suggested the peanut butter might be a premium product, with one saying, “Maybe this is no palm oil kind of peanut butter that is very expensive.”
A small label with a bigger issue
While the post offered no further context from the employer, the reactions highlighted the usual fault line in employer-helper relationships: where shared household resources end and personal boundaries begin.
Whether the note was meant seriously or as a joke, the image, for some, symbolised unnecessary humiliation over a minor item. For others, it reflected frustration from past experiences and tight household budgets.
Perhaps the real issue wasn’t about the peanut butter, but was more about communication, because a few words on a jar can say far more than intended and even hurt someone if we’re not extra careful.
Read related: ‘You are here for a job, not for your employer’s expensive food!’ — Employer vents frustration at maids in Singapore
