SINGAPORE: A local man took to social media to share that the woman he’s dated for just one month expects him to pay for everything.
On Monday (Mar 2), he posted on the r/sgdatingscene forum, explaining that although “they hit it off right away,” he’s been hesitating to take things to the next level because this woman wants the “ultimate princess right off the bat.”
“I paid for every single date, and we meet up like 4–5 times a week, which is fine, but it gets kinda weird when she isn’t even willing to pay for small items under S$10 and would always look at me to make the payment,” he wrote.
“She also requested me to give her an allowance for her holiday trips, which I’m not involved in. That is excluding all the gifts and items that she told me to buy for her. To me, I should be doing all these only if she is my wife or fiancée. So far, she hasn’t spent a dime when she is out with me.”
When he confronted her about this issue, the woman merely responded that “she’s really broke right now” and assured him that things would improve “once she gets a job.”
At the end of his post, he asked other forum users for advice. “Is this what all the so-called providers are doing? Don’t you guys feel like the woman should at least do something to earn this kind of treatment? I feel more like a sugar daddy now; everything is so transactional. I would be taking all the risk, wouldn’t I? ”
“It feels completely one-sided.”
Recognising that the man was being taken advantage of, most readers encouraged him to stop seeing the woman.
One individual said, “I’m someone who has always dated provider-type men, and even I don’t approve of this.”
“Being a provider isn’t about blindly paying for everything or funding someone’s lifestyle before there’s even a committed relationship. It’s a mindset, wanting to take care of your partner, being generous, creating security, but that only makes sense when it’s mutual and when there’s actually a partnership. Right now it just sounds one-sided.”
Another remarked, “I feel like you know the answer already, but you are here to seek validation. I’m a girl, and I don’t know why guys stay with girls who expect them to pay for every date. I lost my job before, too, but never once expected anyone to pay for my expenses, and if she doesn’t even have enough savings for a meal….. why do you wanna be with someone like that?!”
A third added, “At the end of the day, a sustainable relationship should feel like you’re getting a fair deal out of it. Based on your account, it feels completely one-sided. So the question you should ask yourself is: ‘Are you happy in it?’”
Meanwhile, a fourth reader advised him to think beyond the present moment and consider the long-term implications of staying. “Imagine the frustration now and imagine continuing to live like this for the next 40 to 50 years, with the frustration multiplied many times, if you continue to stay together.”
In other news, a 46-year-old Singaporean with a decade of experience in project management shared online that he has not received a single job offer despite actively applying for the past year.
In a post on the r/singaporejobs forum, he explained that things have been difficult ever since he left his job a year ago to handle family matters.
