SINGAPORE: A man earning S$110,000 a year has shared online that his girlfriend has been nudging him to increase his monthly spending to S$3,000.
Writing on the r/singaporefi forum on Tuesday (Mar 24), the man shared that he has been intentionally keeping his monthly expenses at about S$2,000, even though he is in a strong financial position.
He said his net worth and investments currently stand at around S$700,000. In addition, he and his girlfriend have already secured a Prime classification BTO flat valued at about S$700,000, which is expected to be completed in roughly four years.
“I made an effort to cap my monthly expenses around S$2,000, inclusive of my share of contribution to household expenses such as utilities. Any unused amount from that budget will then be kept for entertainment purposes, such as the purchase of flight tickets or accommodations for travel.”
“As someone growing up from a humble family background, I do not feel deprived living on a S$2,000/month budget.”
His girlfriend, however, appears to take a different view and has been encouraging him to spend an additional S$1,000 or so each month, particularly to allow for more flexibility when it comes to travel.
The man said he disagrees with this view. “I don’t think that we should increase our expenses to match our income because that would lead us down a slippery slope of lifestyle creep.”
He also worries that he may lose his job one day. “The tech industry has been extremely volatile, so a layoff can happen at any time, which makes it important to have a greater reserve for a rainy day. Additionally, I don’t think that S$2k per month in terms of expenses is low when that is around 50% of the median wage in my age group.”
Unsure how to approach the situation, he turned to the online community for advice on how to have a constructive conversation with his girlfriend and find a balance that works for both of them.
“Both of you are not aligned on finances.”
In the comments, one Singaporean Redditor advised him to either “change his partner or change his budget.”
“You decide which one is easier,” they wrote. “Being on the same page with your expenditure is like the most important thing in your relationship before tying the knot.”
Another echoed this view, writing, “Both of you are not aligned on finances, which is a major cause of divorce anywhere in the world. I don’t know how you got to the stage of BTO without discussing finances… Now is the time to do it.”
On the other hand, some suggested setting aside a proper budget for travel, instead of just using whatever is left over from his S$2,000 monthly spending.
One wrote, “I’m going to go against the grain and say you should set aside a budget for travel, entertainment, and stuff, not whatever is left over from the monthly S$2K expenditure. That amount is surviving; it is not living and experiencing life.”
They continued, “I lived like that for years with S$2k monthly spending, and my experience is you should live life a bit more when you are younger, especially when you are in a better position compared to people who have no choice but to cap their expenditures at S$2K.”
A few Redditors added that he should talk things through with his girlfriend and try to understand where she is coming from.
“Often, it’s not the number that matters but the perception that you’re not prioritising your partner in your spending. Try talking to her about where this change in view is coming from: her friends/colleagues going on lavish holidays? Showing off a new accessory/bag/shoe? For greater peace of mind, you could occasionally spend on a thoughtful gift or start up a ‘wife fund’ that you use especially for her.”
In other news, an employer took to social media to express her confusion after finding out that her former helper, who requested to “return to her home country” just a week into her job and whom she had returned to the agency, had, in fact, remained in Singapore.
In a post on the r/askSingapore forum on Sunday (March 15), the employer explained that she contacted the agency immediately when the helper said she needed to leave “because of a family emergency.”
Read more: ‘Doesn’t add up’: Employer says maid asked to go home but was later found still in SG
