SINGAPORE: A woman has drawn attention online after sharing her discomfort with certain private-hire vehicle (PHV) drivers, alleging that they repeatedly ask intrusive personal questions and make her uneasy during rides by staring at her through the rearview mirror.
In a post shared on SGWhispers on Friday (Jan 30), she explained that as a woman who is often viewed as “conventionally attractive”, she frequently encounters “unwanted attention and harassment” and has, over time, become somewhat accustomed to it.
However, she said her patience wears thin whenever she books a Grab ride, and the driver begins asking overly personal and intrusive questions.
“It really grinds my gears,” she said. “They would ask intrusive personal questions such as, ‘Do you have a bf?’, ‘Wow, wear until so nice, go bf house ah?’, ‘You staying here alone or with family?’, and ‘Wah go shopping with bf ah?’”
Clearly fed up, she did not mince her words. “First of all, it’s none of your business. Secondly, I am a paying customer. I am paying for a service- to drive me from Point A to Point B. I’m not here to engage in conversation with you or make small talk. This is not a KTV, not a bar, and we are not on a date.”
She went on to point out that her lack of response should have been obvious enough. “If you ask a question and there’s no answer, plus I’m wearing my AirPods; that’s a pretty obvious sign I do not wanna talk to you.”
“Also, I am a woman alone in the car with you. A male stranger. Which puts me in a vulnerable position. Leering at me through the rearview mirror, asking personal questions, etc., is really crossing the line, not to mention extremely unprofessional.”
Anticipating backlash, the woman said her post would likely trigger criticism from some male PHV drivers, but she made it clear she was not bothered. She urged them to stop consuming explicit content and projecting their fantasies onto female passengers, adding that such behaviour only turns them into “disgusting creeps” who view every woman through a warped lens.
She ended her post with a scathing remark, “You make S$10/ hour, most of y’all are ugly, and you think you got a chance with me. Look in the mirror before you speak.”
“It happens more often than one would think.”
In the comments section, netizens were quick to push back, pointing out that PHV drivers striking up small talk is hardly unusual and certainly not something reserved for her alone.
One shared, “I am not attractive. I am an auntie and got kid. The driver talks to me too and looks at me via the rearview mirror (common courtesy to look at people you’re talking to, yes?). Based on your sentence of ‘you make $10/hr’, you may (MAY ONLY) be attractive on the outside, but defo ugly on the inside. Who are you to judge them by how much was made? Tsk tsk…”
Another echoed the sentiment, saying, “As someone who takes a lot of PHV, uncle will also ask me, ‘Wa wear so nice go where?’. So I’m very certain you’re not ‘conventionally attractive.’”
While a handful of commenters initially sympathised with her discomfort, many admitted they changed their minds after reading the way she spoke about the drivers.
One wrote, “It was a valid criticism and feedback until the immature personal attacks in the last paragraph, which ironically now put her in the same class of character category as them.”
Another wrote, “I was going to empathise with this woman, but then I read the last 2 sentences.”
That said, not everyone disagreed with her. Some commenters felt she had a point and argued that some PHV drivers come off as creepy.
One shared, “A few of my uncles drive PHV. Driving PHV to tackle young, attractive girls happens a lot in their trade. So yeah, you’re not wrong, it happens more often than one would think. If you think it doesn’t happen, that’s because you’re not attractive or you are a man.”
In the midst of the back and forth, a few tried to offer practical advice instead of taking sides. Several suggested that if she truly wanted a quiet ride, she could simply use Grab’s silent option and avoid the awkwardness altogether.
In other news, a local employee turned to Reddit to ask for opinions after being told not to use a pantry that some of her Malay colleagues regarded as off-limits to “non-halal people.”
Posting on the r/SingaporeRaw subreddit, the employee shared that she was still relatively new to a particular office floor, and because of that, she assumed all shared facilities were open to everyone.
Read more: ‘Be more sensitive’: Employee shocked after director restricted her from using ‘halal pantry’
