SINGAPORE: In a quietly brave act of speaking up, a domestic helper in Singapore took to the Direct Hire Transfer Singapore Maid/Domestic Helper Facebook group to express her exhaustion and concern over what she described as excessive and inappropriate work demands — specifically, being made to massage her employer for nearly six hours straight.
“Sir, I’ve never complained in all my years working here, but today I feel that Madam’s request was too much,” she wrote in a WhatsApp text message to her employer’s husband, which she later shared anonymously on Facebook.
The helper said she was asked to start massaging her employer from 2:00 p.m. to 7:50 p.m. Despite being visibly tired, her employer kept extending the session.
“My hands are super tired… At 6 p.m., she asked if I wanted to eat, but I said I would prefer to finish the massage first before eating. At 7 p.m., I said I was hungry and wanted to go buy food, but she told me to continue the massage and buy the food later.”
But the demands didn’t end there. “At 7:50 p.m., she told me to go buy food and also asked me to prepare some items for her afterwards, and then to continue giving her a facial massage.”
“I’m not a masseuse,” the helper lamented. “Even giving a one-hour massage is already tiring. She often asks for many hours. Today, it just felt like too much.”
“My hand is shaking already, and… got open skin and wounds already…”
The post hit a raw nerve with many fellow helpers and other employers, who flooded the comments section with both sympathy and strong opinions.
One commenter wrote sharply: “Massage from 2 p.m. to 7:50 p.m.? Hello, she’s not a robot, she’s a human!”
Another added: “Wow! Is massaging an employer a maid’s duty? Why does the boss like to bully the helper? Go to a massage place lah! One hour is just S$50!”
Some warned that agreeing once may set a precedent: “You shouldn’t have agreed to massage your madam in the first place… now she might keep asking for it,” said one.
A fellow helper also shared her own forced massaging experience: “Me too, every day and every night. I have to be a house helper plus a massage therapist — full package! My hand is shaking already, and it is so dry from ointments and massage cream. I also got open skin and wounds already.”
Another frustrated commenter pointed out the legal and ethical limits: “If this were me, I’d ask for extra money. Massage is not in the contract paperwork!”
“Explain to your employer that it is outside your job scope…”
According to the Ministry of Manpower (MOM) in Singapore, a migrant domestic worker is permitted to perform domestic chores only at the residential address declared to MOM. These duties include household tasks such as cleaning, cooking, and caring for children or the elderly, but not services like massaging the employer.
While MOM does not explicitly list massage in its guidelines, such activities fall outside the standard scope of domestic work unless they are directly related to caregiving for a dependent with medical needs, based on mutual agreement.
If a helper feels uncomfortable or believes she is being asked to perform duties beyond her job scope, she can clarify expectations with her employer or seek assistance from the Centre for Domestic Employees (CDE) or report to MOM.
Reporting abuse or seeking help
Centre for Domestic Employees (CDE)
Ministry of Manpower (MOM)
- Phone: 6438 5122 for general inquiries/reporting infringements
- MDW Helpline: 1800 339 5505 (or +65 6339 5505 for overseas callers)
“You must complain to MOM, not your Sir…”
The helper who posted about her situation hesitated to confront her employer directly out of fear.
“I wanted to raise this to Madam, but I’m afraid she might misunderstand. Please don’t tell Madam yet — I need your advice first,” she informed her employer’s husband.
Some commenters advised her to speak face-to-face with her Madam and clarify boundaries — before things escalate. Others strongly recommended going straight to MOM:
“You must complain to MOM, not your Sir, because the boss in Singapore is the wife, not your Sir. AIYOOO!” one exclaimed.
“Helpers are humans, not robots…”
This viral post has once again sparked a broader conversation around the blurred boundaries of domestic work in Singapore — especially where helpers are expected to take on roles far outside their job scope, often in silence.
As one commenter poignantly said, “Health is wealth. If you get sick, who’s going to support your family? Helpers are humans, not robots.”
Read related: ‘I’m not a robot!’ — Maid says after her employer doesn’t allow her to take a 1-hour nap to rest in the afternoons
