SINGAPORE: An employee shared on Reddit that she feels she has been unfairly singled out by her manager, who appears to treat her much more harshly than the rest of her colleagues.
In her post on the r/singaporejobs forum, the employee wrote that her manager “often calls out her mistakes in front of the whole office” and “puts a lot of pressure” on her to complete everything by the end of the day, even when some tasks are not urgent.
She also said she noticed a clear difference in how her manager speaks to her compared to others.
“Her tone towards me is very different compared to how she speaks to my colleagues—she’s much nicer to them.”
Unsurprisingly, being constantly put on the spot has started to wear her down. She shared that her anxiety at work has been “getting worse,” to the point where the thought of going into the office fills her with dread.
It has even started to affect her physically. She said that whenever she receives a Teams message from her manager, her heart “starts racing” and she feels “physically shaky.” Even when she is at home, simply thinking about work leaves her feeling uneasy, which is hardly ideal for anyone trying to switch off after hours.
“I’ve never felt like this in my previous job. I used to be able to handle stress, but this feels different, and it’s starting to affect me quite a bit.”
Unsure of what to do next, she turned to others for advice, asking if this is something she should try to push through or if it is a sign she should leave.
“Has anyone experienced something similar? How did you decide whether to stay or go?”
“If you do not see yourself continuing under her, then yes, time to move on.”
In the comments, one user asked the post author, “Are the mistakes real? Does she call out others’ mistakes in public too? Did you try to tell her it’s not urgent and can be done 3 days later so you can double-check? Does she do this to you or others as well?”
In response, the employee admitted that the mistakes were real, but said they were only “minor” errors or small details she had missed. She also shared that she had not told her manager that certain tasks were not urgent, as she already had a sense that her manager would not take that well, so she chose to keep quiet and just comply instead.
She also clarified that she was the only one being treated this way.
Another user weighed in with a different perspective, suggesting that there could be a reason the manager was being particularly strict with her.
“If she is only micromanaging you, that means she noticed a pattern in you. Perhaps you always miss deadlines or you make repeated mistakes,” they said.
“Many people think, ‘Aiya, small minor mistakes only.’ Why kick up a fuss? It depends on what and where the mistakes are. If you are, e.g., a lawyer, you cannot get an NRIC wrong. If you are an accountant, an extra zero makes a world of difference. You get the gist.”
A third added, “When was the last time you had 1:1 with her? Have you voiced out about improving processes and deliverables? If that hasn’t, give it a try to work it out. Let her know how you will deliver the deliverables. If you do not see yourself continuing under her, then yes, time to move on.”
Steps to take if your manager is targeting you
Career experts say there are usually two reasons a manager might act this way: either they are bullying the employee, or they are trying to push them out of the company. Either way, it’s important not to ignore the behaviour and to take steps to protect yourself.
If you find yourself in this situation, one of the first things you should do is keep a clear record of what’s happening. Write down what was said or done, the dates and times it occurred, how it made you feel, any proof or messages you have, and the names of any witnesses who saw what happened.
You can also try addressing the issue directly with your manager. If speaking face to face feels uncomfortable, raising it through email is another option.
If that doesn’t help, bring the matter to HR or another neutral party in your organisation so they can intervene, or reach out to the Tripartite Alliance for Fair and Progressive Employment Practices (TAFEP) for support.
Read also: ‘Is burnout a badge of honour in Singapore work places?’ Local worker calls out long-hours culture
