SINGAPORE: An employer has sparked an online discussion after sharing her uncertainty over how to handle her domestic helper’s request for additional benefits beyond what was initially agreed upon.
In a post on the Direct Hire Transfer Singapore Maid / Domestic Helper Facebook group on Friday (Mar 20), the employer explained that she already provides what she considers essential daily items for her helper. These include coffee, shampoo, soap, a toothbrush, and toothpaste.
However, she said her helper recently asked for an extra food allowance and sanitary pads after learning that a friend’s employer provides these benefits.
In response, the employer told her, “I already provide what I believe are sufficient basic needs, and that I treat her well here. I also prefer not to compare with her friend, as she is working with expatriate families and may have different arrangements (including salary), which are sometimes supported by their companies.”
She added that she has come across discussions in expatriate wives’ groups where even specific brands of coffee, sanitary pads, or tampons provided to helpers are talked about. According to her, such practices can sometimes lead helpers who have worked in those households to develop higher expectations.
“I feel that this kind of treatment can sometimes make helpers who have worked in such households expect more than what is reasonably provided, and if we don’t provide it, the helper complains and says you are bad or stingy just because I don’t provide S$10-20 pads per month and an extra food allowance of S$100-200 per month.”
Seeking guidance, the employer asked others in the group whether there were any official guidelines, such as from the Ministry of Manpower, that clarified what employers are required to provide. She also invited others to share their experiences.
“I would [also] like to ask what you provide for your helper each month, aside from comfortable accommodation, 3 meals a day, enough rest time, and off days.”
“I only provide the basic stuff.”
In the comments, several employers shared their own arrangements.
One shared, “I provide my helper’s needs, and she is free to eat anything at home, including chocolates and delicacies from overseas. No food allowance; she eats what we eat. She can cook or buy bread for breakfast. We have one food wallet I always place in the living room, and she just takes money to buy food if we run out. No questions asked.”
Another commented, “I provided basic shampoo, shower, toothpaste, toothbrush, sanitary pads, coffee, biscuits, and snacks for her since she’s fresh and with a loan. After her loan ends, I intend to stop the sanitary pads.”
A third added, “I only provide the basic stuff—soap, shampoo, toothbrush & toothpaste. My helper eats with us at the same table at the same time. Other toiletries she buys for herself. I don’t pamper my helper nor spoil the market. She’s been with me for 8 years now.”
Some, meanwhile, chimed in to air their frustrations. One wrote, “Is it just me, or are helpers getting increasingly entitled lately? Mine expects me to pay for her EZ-Link and prepaid top-ups and even wants me to treat her to Mala, chocolate, and crackers! I had to remind her, I hired a helper, I didn’t adopt a daughter.”
According to the Ministry of Manpower (MOM), employers are required to provide adequate accommodation and food, including three meals a day. Living conditions should include proper ventilation, safety, privacy, and sufficient space. Employers are also expected to provide basic household and personal items such as a mattress, pillow, blanket, and toiletries like soap, shampoo, a toothbrush, and toothpaste.
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