SINGAPORE: A heartbroken woman took to Reddit to share how her five-year relationship ended in devastation after her boyfriend, who had long struggled with gambling and risky financial behaviour, broke up with her because he believed he could never give her a stable future.
In a post on the r/SGMoney subreddit on Monday (Nov 10), she revealed that even before their relationship began, her boyfriend had already accumulated a debt of around S$20,000 from betting on football matches. After losing that sum, he took the seemingly responsible step of banning himself from the gambling site and began repaying his father, who had bailed him out.
“I continued on as he actually banned himself from the site and was actively repaying his dad,” she recalled, explaining that at the time, she truly believed he was turning over a new leaf.
For a while, it seemed that he had indeed changed, but about two years into the relationship, history repeated itself. This time, the stakes were even higher. He lost a staggering S$200,000 through cryptocurrency trading, a loss that once again forced his father to step in and help settle the debt.
The woman said her boyfriend spent years repaying his father for the crypto losses, and things eventually appeared to stabilise. However, she soon began noticing worrying patterns again.
He became obsessed with blind box collectables, mobile gacha games, and even NFTs — habits that mirrored the same impulsive and thrill-seeking behaviours she had seen in his gambling days.
“Even after crypto, he felt ‘empty’ and went to spend S$1,000 on gacha games on mobile and even wanted to do NFTs,” she said, expressing disbelief that he could so easily fall back into another costly obsession.
As the months went by, she observed more signs that something was wrong. Over the weekend leading up to their breakup, he repeatedly complained about being broke and remarked that “everything is expensive,” despite having just received his pay cheque.
The woman shared that she never expected him to shoulder the financial burden in their relationship. In fact, she had already decided to support him emotionally and financially while he worked on rebuilding his life.
“I don’t need him to give me a good life; I can self-support, and I even know he has debt, and I told him I will cover our renovation costs. I don’t understand why he would choose to be reckless in his gambling? I thought S$200k would be enough of a shock to him.”
“I stuck with him for more than five years despite knowing all this; I even offered to pay for renovations and furniture. I’m not someone who expects material or lavish things. I’m all in to support him. I don’t get what else he wants.”
After the breakup, the woman said her boyfriend completely cut off contact. He read her messages but refused to respond to any of them.
“He’s just stonewalling me. I told him one day that if he didn’t reply, he probably went back to high-risk activities and lost money. He read it but didn’t respond.”
“Do you think I dodged a bullet, that his old habits die hard, and that he’s back to risky, impulsive behaviour?” she asked at the end of her post.
“Dodged a bullet, do not re-engage.”
A few commenters on Reddit offered her words of comfort, saying she likely made a lucky escape from a partner whose unresolved issues could have caused her even greater pain down the road.
Others, meanwhile, reminded her that love alone cannot fix someone who is unwilling to face their own demons.
“I think he is feeling guilty, and also sees that he can’t give you a good future,” one user said. “Or… he chose to be reckless in his gambling and doesn’t wish for you to waste time on him.”
“This gambling addiction, based on what you mentioned, I think lies deeper than wanting to win more money. He probably wants to chase a dopamine rush. He’s probably unaware of it, but he is aware of the hurt it brings to you.”
Another commented, “Dodged a bullet. Do not re-engage. In my honest opinion, gambling addiction can totally wreck a family. Racking up S$200k in losses is huge (to me), unless you’re saying he has like 10 million in net worth.”
A third added, “You dodged a bullet; have some self-respect and work on yourself.”
In other news, a man who recently returned to the dating scene after years of hiatus was stunned when his date grilled him about his financial background.
In a Reddit post titled “Dating expectations imposed on a guy or girl”, he shared that his date didn’t just ask about his job or hobbies but went straight into questions about his “finances, social status, and even why he hadn’t offered to pay for her friends’ meals.”
