SINGAPORE: An employer recently vented her frustration on social media, saying she “felt used” by her domestic helper who suddenly decided to leave after finding what she believed was a “better” employer.
Posting in the Direct Hire Transfer Singapore Maid/Domestic Helper Facebook group on Friday (Oct 17), the employer shared that the helper had only been with her family for a few months before abruptly announcing her intention to transfer.
According to her post, the helper gave a vague reason for wanting to leave, claiming that the other helper in the household “has no common sense.” When asked to explain further, the helper could only point to a single, trivial incident involving a blocked sink.
The other helper, however, told the employer that she was unaware of any problem and was shocked by the accusation. She did not even see the sink incident as an issue, as it was so minor.
“I feel blindsided and, honestly, I feel used,” the employer wrote. “It’s starting to feel like we were just a stepping stone for her while she waited for something better. I’ve gone out of my way to make sure she felt respected and supported, and she has become close to my children. We had a clear agreement, and now she wants to break it over something so trivial.”
The employer added that before hiring the helper, her previous employer had already warned her that this helper had a history of transferring frequently without solid reasons.
“Her previous employer warned me she had a pattern of wanting to transfer without solid reasons. I asked her about it, and she explained she had been asked to work on her off days and there were food issues, which honestly seemed fair to me at the time,” she wrote.
Though the employer initially felt hesitant about hiring her, she ultimately gave in at the end as the helper “messaged her multiple times saying she would love to join” and “reassured her she was genuinely keen and not just choosing them because she had no other options.”
The employer also mentioned that the terms of employment were clear and fair. The helper received $850 per month, a full weekly rest day, a 9 p.m. curfew, and the freedom to leave the house at any time in the morning. She could also choose her own meals, which the employer provided, and was even offered coverage for a flight to visit a friend abroad.
Regarding her duties, the employer said that the helper was only responsible for cleaning and some light childcare. Additionally, she had no cooking duties and was given a two- to three-hour rest period in the middle of each day.
Unsure of how to address this whole mess, the employer sought guidance from the online community, asking, “What should I do?”
“Do not allow transfer; send her straight home…”
In the comments, many netizens urged the employer to send the helper back home. One said, “Instead of transferring her, you can send her home. But you cannot tell her beforehand, also cause then she may plot something, e.g. run away, and give you more trouble.”
Another chimed in, “She’s taking advantage of you. Please do other employers a favour by not letting her transfer, thank you.”
A third added, “I’ll give you a very good suggestion. Do not allow transfer; send her straight home to the point of origin in the contract, nowhere else, and wash your hands of her. You should not have pity for someone who used you, who played you, and who is so ungrateful! I repeat, no transfer. Hope you will find another genuine and honest helper.”
Several domestic helpers also joined the discussion, noting how fortunate the helper was to have such a considerate and kind employer who provided a generous salary.
One commented, “Woah, she is so very lucky; my salary is only S$725 and I get only one day off per month, and I’m on my second contract with them now.”
Another wrote, “I hope I can have such a very kind employer and this high salary. God bless you, madam; I hope you find a helper who is as good as you.”
If employers have issues or complaints about their domestic helpers, they can share feedback about the helper’s performance on the Ministry of Manpower’s website.
